About this book:
Diary to my 6 children, chronicling our daily journeys as we grow in God, life, and family.
Sample (Entry 1)
Mama Diaries: Entry 1
May 20th, 2011
Elijah-11, Josiah-9, Hailey-8, Timothy-6, Allyson & Jesse- 2, Mom-29, Dad-30
To the 6 best blessings of my life,
I saw a story yesterday about a Mother who knew she was dying from cancer when her daughter was just 6 years old. She had a lifetime of things she wanted to tell her daughter and definitely not enough time. She began making videos for every milestone in her daughter’s life that she knew she was going to miss. She made hundreds upon hundreds of them for her daughter to watch as she grew up and became a woman.
I was inspired as I thought about all the things I write today and have written in my past… I realized that the best legacy I could leave behind were my written words for the dearest little people in my life. I’m not dying like that little girl’s mother did. But we are all ultimately dying, and only God knows when. So today I begin a journey, a journey to share my thoughts, my daily interactions and joys with you as I watch you grow. None of you ever seize to amaze me. Every day each of you bring something to the table of this family in your own unique ways. As a writer, aside from God himself, you are all my best inspirations in this life. You inspire me in every way. I hope that one day, 10, 20, 40, 50 years from now, if God still graces us with this earth, you can all read back over my words, our lives, read them to your children, smile, and grow.
Josiah, today you said to me, “Mom, I just made this up: How does a cat say goodbye?... “Me-ouwt.” Where do you come up with this stuff? You gave me a chuckle, and I was quite impressed. Yesterday at the dentist you said, “I didn’t have any cavities! You know why I didn’t have any? Because I prayed that I wouldn’t, and so I didn’t!” Josiah, your faith has always amazed me. You are exactly what God commands of us as Christians: to have the faith of a child. You believe that whatever you pray and ask God for, he’ll answer and give it, and you are always sharing with everyone all your answered prayers from God. You are constantly renewing and reminding me of my own faith in God. You are always showing me how God wants me to have faith in him as an adult, because adults sometimes forget how to have that kind of faith. Adults are supposed to be the disciples of their children. But I think we take for granted what disciples our children really are and how much we can learn from them. Children are like little pieces of God’s Word walking around and showing us who He wants us to be. I am so grateful that God has blessed me with six little pieces of his heart to teach and help me grow as a person.
Your counselor told me that at your last session she asked you how you deal with things that you don’t want to deal with it. You told her, “When I don’t want to deal with something I just go on autopilot. The rest of the time I’m on manual.” The good Lord has already given you more wisdom than you know. I’m not even sure where you’ve heard those words. But there is a lot of wisdom in them. We get like that as Christians sometimes my dearest children. When you’re living for God you want to do your best to steer clear of autopilot. You don’t want to go through the motions because it is just too awesome living for God. Live for God on manual. You choose on how you will focus on and view this world, positively. You choose your actions and behaviors, and let everything you do honor God.
I was so proud of you Eli, when the counselor told me you changed her radio station in her car to K-love, our favorite Christian station. She didn’t know you did it because she had the other kids in the car, and she was busy talking to them at the time. She hadn’t even noticed the music was different than her regular station. But when she got into her car the next day she noticed right away. She said she left it on that station because it made her feel a peace inside. Do you know what you did son? You planted a very loving seed. You didn’t tell her you thought the music she had playing was offensive (with your nose snubbed in the air.) You didn’t shove your opinion or music ‘down her throat.’ You quietly and gently turned the station, so gentle she didn’t even notice, without saying a word, and when her life slowed down enough for a moment, she heard good godly music that brought peace to her soul. Because you did that, she didn’t feel condemned for the choice of music she already had playing in her car. She didn’t feel judged. When people who don’t know God like we do feel condemned and judged by Christians, they turn the opposite direction of where we’re trying to point them. You were a witness just through being you and setting a gentle example. You did what Jesus probably would’ve done because he is a kind and gentle God. He doesn’t force people into living for and loving him. He just loves them, just the way they are, and that love draws them to Him. When you show people the same love God would show them, you are showing them God’s love. You are allowing God to use you as his vessel. You also showed her what a fine young man you are. Most kids your age are listening to quite inappropriate music these days. Of all the radio stations you could’ve turned to, you chose that one. I am so proud of you son.
Hailey, as we were cleaning up the house today I bent over to pick something up. You said, “Mom, don’t do any bending. I will pick it up.” Wow. I was so touched by your thoughtfulness. You know my back is not in good condition and that I recently had four different surgeries on it. You’ve always been a helper. It’s the type of nature you were born with, helping others. You are always your teachers ‘favorite’ because you’re such a good helper to her. That is such a beautiful spirit to have, the spirit of a servant. We are all servants to each other, and in doing so, we are serving God. You are such a wonderful example to me and others on what it means to serve others. This world needs people like you… someone willing and ready to roll their sleeves up and do what needs to be done. That’s what it takes to be a soul winner and get as many people as you can to heaven with you. I love this fact about all of my children; that they are all so giving and not selfish at all. When I was in the Air Force, one of our mottos was “Service before self.” You know though, it’s a good motto to have when living for God. What is our service? Serving others, and in doing so, we’re serving God.
Timothy, my dearest Timmy… I don’t know how many times a day you give me hugs. You are a hugging boy, and you always say, “I love you Mommy.” I know I have not always received those hugs too well either. There have been things in my past, traumatizing things that have made it difficult for me to receive affection from others. But you never seem to notice. You never stop hugging me, and through time, I have learned to get better and better at receiving hugs from people because of you. Your love and affection for me has been absolutely unconditional, and you know what? That’s just the way that God loves us, absolute unconditional love and affection for us. You are already allowing God to use as his vessel to show people his unconditional love and affection for them. Is it any wonder that you all never seize to amaze me, on a daily basis? You are truly little pieces of God showing his love, shining his light, being his hands and feet. I absolutely adore you all.
My dearest twinks… Allyson and Jesse, you two really rocked our world when you were born. I think I can speak for the entire family, that you’re both the lights of our little world. We all adore you so much. Allyson you’re already so independent you amaze me. Jesse you’re such a loving, cuddly little boy. Ally, today you walked into my room singing Jesus Loves Me, and it was the most beautiful sound I’d heard all day. From the day you were born, I have adored every second of watching you two grow. You bring a lot of laughs and smiles to this family on a daily basis, and you both keep us all on our toes. We love watching you play with your dolls Ally, because you think they come in pairs. You never play with just one baby. You always have to have two. It’s the cutest thing.
I thought of you two the other day when I was thinking on things of God. You know, as Christians, we scatter seeds and hope one takes. We scatter many, and maybe only one person will come to God each time. But that one precious soul being born into the kingdom of God makes it all worth it. It’s just the way we’re conceived in the womb. Lots of seeds are “scattered”, but typically, only one takes at a time, and then a beautiful baby is born from it. But sometimes, we get two! Or three, four, five, six…. All at the same time. Whether one baby is born or 20 at once, heaven rejoices on those birthdays, just the way Mommies and Daddies do when their babies are born. God has so carefully planned our time out on this earth that everything about it from birth to death, is all about Him and his Word. I am so truly blessed to share this time with all of you my loves.
I love you so much,
Mom
May 20th, 2011
Elijah-11, Josiah-9, Hailey-8, Timothy-6, Allyson & Jesse- 2, Mom-29, Dad-30
To the 6 best blessings of my life,
I saw a story yesterday about a Mother who knew she was dying from cancer when her daughter was just 6 years old. She had a lifetime of things she wanted to tell her daughter and definitely not enough time. She began making videos for every milestone in her daughter’s life that she knew she was going to miss. She made hundreds upon hundreds of them for her daughter to watch as she grew up and became a woman.
I was inspired as I thought about all the things I write today and have written in my past… I realized that the best legacy I could leave behind were my written words for the dearest little people in my life. I’m not dying like that little girl’s mother did. But we are all ultimately dying, and only God knows when. So today I begin a journey, a journey to share my thoughts, my daily interactions and joys with you as I watch you grow. None of you ever seize to amaze me. Every day each of you bring something to the table of this family in your own unique ways. As a writer, aside from God himself, you are all my best inspirations in this life. You inspire me in every way. I hope that one day, 10, 20, 40, 50 years from now, if God still graces us with this earth, you can all read back over my words, our lives, read them to your children, smile, and grow.
Josiah, today you said to me, “Mom, I just made this up: How does a cat say goodbye?... “Me-ouwt.” Where do you come up with this stuff? You gave me a chuckle, and I was quite impressed. Yesterday at the dentist you said, “I didn’t have any cavities! You know why I didn’t have any? Because I prayed that I wouldn’t, and so I didn’t!” Josiah, your faith has always amazed me. You are exactly what God commands of us as Christians: to have the faith of a child. You believe that whatever you pray and ask God for, he’ll answer and give it, and you are always sharing with everyone all your answered prayers from God. You are constantly renewing and reminding me of my own faith in God. You are always showing me how God wants me to have faith in him as an adult, because adults sometimes forget how to have that kind of faith. Adults are supposed to be the disciples of their children. But I think we take for granted what disciples our children really are and how much we can learn from them. Children are like little pieces of God’s Word walking around and showing us who He wants us to be. I am so grateful that God has blessed me with six little pieces of his heart to teach and help me grow as a person.
Your counselor told me that at your last session she asked you how you deal with things that you don’t want to deal with it. You told her, “When I don’t want to deal with something I just go on autopilot. The rest of the time I’m on manual.” The good Lord has already given you more wisdom than you know. I’m not even sure where you’ve heard those words. But there is a lot of wisdom in them. We get like that as Christians sometimes my dearest children. When you’re living for God you want to do your best to steer clear of autopilot. You don’t want to go through the motions because it is just too awesome living for God. Live for God on manual. You choose on how you will focus on and view this world, positively. You choose your actions and behaviors, and let everything you do honor God.
I was so proud of you Eli, when the counselor told me you changed her radio station in her car to K-love, our favorite Christian station. She didn’t know you did it because she had the other kids in the car, and she was busy talking to them at the time. She hadn’t even noticed the music was different than her regular station. But when she got into her car the next day she noticed right away. She said she left it on that station because it made her feel a peace inside. Do you know what you did son? You planted a very loving seed. You didn’t tell her you thought the music she had playing was offensive (with your nose snubbed in the air.) You didn’t shove your opinion or music ‘down her throat.’ You quietly and gently turned the station, so gentle she didn’t even notice, without saying a word, and when her life slowed down enough for a moment, she heard good godly music that brought peace to her soul. Because you did that, she didn’t feel condemned for the choice of music she already had playing in her car. She didn’t feel judged. When people who don’t know God like we do feel condemned and judged by Christians, they turn the opposite direction of where we’re trying to point them. You were a witness just through being you and setting a gentle example. You did what Jesus probably would’ve done because he is a kind and gentle God. He doesn’t force people into living for and loving him. He just loves them, just the way they are, and that love draws them to Him. When you show people the same love God would show them, you are showing them God’s love. You are allowing God to use you as his vessel. You also showed her what a fine young man you are. Most kids your age are listening to quite inappropriate music these days. Of all the radio stations you could’ve turned to, you chose that one. I am so proud of you son.
Hailey, as we were cleaning up the house today I bent over to pick something up. You said, “Mom, don’t do any bending. I will pick it up.” Wow. I was so touched by your thoughtfulness. You know my back is not in good condition and that I recently had four different surgeries on it. You’ve always been a helper. It’s the type of nature you were born with, helping others. You are always your teachers ‘favorite’ because you’re such a good helper to her. That is such a beautiful spirit to have, the spirit of a servant. We are all servants to each other, and in doing so, we are serving God. You are such a wonderful example to me and others on what it means to serve others. This world needs people like you… someone willing and ready to roll their sleeves up and do what needs to be done. That’s what it takes to be a soul winner and get as many people as you can to heaven with you. I love this fact about all of my children; that they are all so giving and not selfish at all. When I was in the Air Force, one of our mottos was “Service before self.” You know though, it’s a good motto to have when living for God. What is our service? Serving others, and in doing so, we’re serving God.
Timothy, my dearest Timmy… I don’t know how many times a day you give me hugs. You are a hugging boy, and you always say, “I love you Mommy.” I know I have not always received those hugs too well either. There have been things in my past, traumatizing things that have made it difficult for me to receive affection from others. But you never seem to notice. You never stop hugging me, and through time, I have learned to get better and better at receiving hugs from people because of you. Your love and affection for me has been absolutely unconditional, and you know what? That’s just the way that God loves us, absolute unconditional love and affection for us. You are already allowing God to use as his vessel to show people his unconditional love and affection for them. Is it any wonder that you all never seize to amaze me, on a daily basis? You are truly little pieces of God showing his love, shining his light, being his hands and feet. I absolutely adore you all.
My dearest twinks… Allyson and Jesse, you two really rocked our world when you were born. I think I can speak for the entire family, that you’re both the lights of our little world. We all adore you so much. Allyson you’re already so independent you amaze me. Jesse you’re such a loving, cuddly little boy. Ally, today you walked into my room singing Jesus Loves Me, and it was the most beautiful sound I’d heard all day. From the day you were born, I have adored every second of watching you two grow. You bring a lot of laughs and smiles to this family on a daily basis, and you both keep us all on our toes. We love watching you play with your dolls Ally, because you think they come in pairs. You never play with just one baby. You always have to have two. It’s the cutest thing.
I thought of you two the other day when I was thinking on things of God. You know, as Christians, we scatter seeds and hope one takes. We scatter many, and maybe only one person will come to God each time. But that one precious soul being born into the kingdom of God makes it all worth it. It’s just the way we’re conceived in the womb. Lots of seeds are “scattered”, but typically, only one takes at a time, and then a beautiful baby is born from it. But sometimes, we get two! Or three, four, five, six…. All at the same time. Whether one baby is born or 20 at once, heaven rejoices on those birthdays, just the way Mommies and Daddies do when their babies are born. God has so carefully planned our time out on this earth that everything about it from birth to death, is all about Him and his Word. I am so truly blessed to share this time with all of you my loves.
I love you so much,
Mom